THE HOLY SPIRIT AS A COMFORTER
“But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.”
It is almost incredible that Jesus promised us a Person who would not only act as intercessor on behalf of our weaknesses and transgressions but would also comfort us in times when we would be shattered with grief on account of our sins.
ALLOW THE HOLY SPIRIT TO FLOW
Annatjie and I have counselled with many couples where both husband and wife had suffered tremendous hurt in their life before getting married. Then, instead of being a source of replenishing and healing, they run each other even further down – just because they do not allow the Holy Spirit to flow through them in support of each other.
THE SPIRIT PICKS YOU UP
Both Annatjie and I myself had suffered much grief and damage in our past, but both of us could testify to the miraculously healing balm of the Holy Spirit as He worked through us, to restore and help each other to become “whole” people again. What a wonderful experience to have the true love of your spouse, knowing her/him to be an instrument of the Holy Spirit in healing your deepest wounds with His fragrant ointment! Often I have sensed the Spirit in Annatjie’s comforting touch or soft words, when I had been dealt a blow either by Satan or by this world. And where I myself had been responsible for my blunder, the Spirit has moved quickly through her to pick me up once again. Indeed, both of us are experiencing daily that God’s Spirit is strengthening our marriage bond in the love expressed so often in His Word. Our children testify to it, also our friends, as well as all the people whom we get to know through our work, dedicated in utter thankfulness to the Lord our Father.
JESUS CHRIST THE CORNERSTONE
The tragedy of having to perceive the desperate efforts of people when a marriage is starting to break up is indescribable. I am of the opinion that most couples harbour these fears in their hearts on that day when they are listening to the prescribed marriage formulary in the presence of family and friends… The number of divorces among nominal Christians is probably the same as that of unbelievers. The reason is very simple: Jesus is not really the cornerstone or keystone of their lives, either apart or together.
A PLACE FOR CHRIST IN THE MODERN WORLD?
There are those who believe that Jesus is of no concern any more in these post-modern times of ours. Most of them have retained only a meagre knowledge of the Son of God – that which they learnt from their Children’s Bible many years ago. What weight can Jesus still carry in the life of a yuppie?? – the person who, with his mobile phone, his PC, his super-modern lifestyle among all technological devices, allows himself to be persuaded by the New Age humanism of the wondrous potential and inherent divineness of mankind? Who dares not to be part of the craze of regularly visiting his “shrink” to de-stress? And when the marriage boat starts to rock you and your “doll” will quickly go to see a sex therapist… Psalm 118.22 says
“The stone which the builders refused is become the head stone of the corner.”
THE RIGHT KEYSTONE
When we start to dig deeper into those marriages breaking down, we soon find that the couple have tried to build on other cornerstones. Some of these, which had seemed sterling, are, for instance, that of being a breadwinner of the highest rank. Another “keystone” could be the mastering of every possible sexual technique. The wives excel in keeping themselves attractive for their husbands, while he joins a gym to keep his body trim. Whatever people do towards a happy marriage need not always be wrong. What is wrong is the wrong keystone! When Jesus has the place of honour in your marriage, your spouse will get everything he or she desires from you. In Isiah 28:16
“Therefore thus saith the Lord GOD, Behold, I lay in Zion for a foundation a stone, a tried stone, a precious corner stone, a sure foundation: he that believeth shall not make haste.”
THE PERFECT FORMULA
Man’s spirit is his innermost being, therefore, seen in this context, his foundation. Where one’s spirit was moulded in the principles of God’s Word, all those splendid features of the Spirit of God will be present in that person. Who shall resist qualities such as love, goodness, humility, kindness, self-restraint, patience, joy, faith?? When two such cornerstones are tied together by the most eminent person of Jesus, then, my friend, you have the perfect formula for a marriage! In Matthew 21:42
“ Jesus saith unto them, Did ye never read in the scriptures, The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes?”
“Wherefore also it is contained in the scripture, Behold, I lay in Sion a chief corner stone, elect, precious: and he that believeth on him shall not be confounded.”
JESUS ABOVE ALL
What does it mean, then, to have Jesus as a cornerstone? Well – that He will be the first love in the hearts of both partners. I love Jesus more than I love Annatjie, and she loves Him more than she loves me. Neither would even think of expecting anything from the other that Jesus would not approve. Together we worship Him and put Him above everything else in our lives. We try to know His will in all our decisions, such as taking a holiday; even when to leave. Together we seek His guidance in spending our money and see Him as involved in every occasion where we either entertain friends or enjoy a night out. We ask Him to give us vision with regard to our dreams for the future. We seek His approval in our relationships with friends and acquaintances. The more we put Him first, the easier it becomes to understand each other and to “flow” together in our daily lives.
Jesus’ presence is indeed tangible in our home – many people who have come for consultation, for instance, have already remarked on it. We believe that a marriage should be the visible manifestation to the world of the love of God. Let’s end off with Isaiah 54:5
“For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.”
DR KRIGE AND HOUSE REGENERATION
This adapted content was extracted from Make your Stand, authored by Dr Ado Krige, the Founding Director of House Regeneration, a South African drug rehabilitation centre offering a comprehensive discipleship training program. By applying principles of Biblical Therapy, using the Scriptures to teach, rebuke, correct, and train in righteousness, House Regeneration counsellors show anyone who has suffered from addiction how to fully understand why they do what they do and how to bring their belief systems in line with the Word of God.
