MONKEY SEE MONEY DO
The so-called democracy holding reign in the world today impels the individual to lay claim to his/her own rights. Since the past half century women are urged to free themselves from masculine “suppression.” Where both parents are compelled to work outside the house, difference of opinion may become the order of the day, as both may reckon that they have equal right to decisions, responsibilities and free time. Strife between the parents usually has the result that the children begin to fear a divorce, particularly the teenagers. This fear is indisputably a breeding-ground for teenage frustration, aggression and rebelliousness. Where, on the other hand, the parents sincerely love each other and cherish, honour and serve each other, it creates a sense of security in the children, and serves as an example for their treating one another. Once again: Monkey see, monkey do…
A COMPLETE UNISON
If you want your children to be patient, you yourself have to be patient with your spouse! God’s standard for a happy marriage is that of complete unison as you will read in the scriptures that follow. There’s no sense in trying to teach your children to do right if your relationship doesn’t attest to it.
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.”
“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. So they are no longer two, but one flesh.”
THE SECCOND PRIORITY
It means that your first priority, next to God, should be your spouse, not your children. The children need parents who will teach them to be good wives or husbands themselves eventually. Children should be taught that the marriage is holy and holds the first place in the list of human relationships. By your setting the correct example, your children should be able to see that a marriage in obedience with God’s Word really works.
THE FAMILY LEADER
A team has to have a leader. God created man (husband) first, so that he could lead. His leadership style he should learn from Christ. He must love his wife, honour her, protect and provide for her, giving himself to her without reserve. This is stated in
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
“Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”
The wife must assist the husband in his life’s task as father, labourer on earth; she must obey, serve and honour him as the head of the family. We read this in Ephesians 5:22:
“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.”
The family and home are the real places for child rearing, not the school, church, or any other institution.
HOLD ON TO JESUS
The one factor that breaks down this unity is sin, that is, not obeying God’s Word. It manifests as selfishness, pride, bitterness, ingratitude, stubbornness, neglect, impatience and cruelty. And it is for these sins that Jesus died on the cross, and we have been freed from them through our faith. If we wish to transfer true marriage happiness to our children, we as parents should confess these sins to each other, together renounce them, and keep holding on to Jesus.
DR KRIGE AND HOUSE REGENERATION
This adapted content was extracted from Make your Stand, authored by Dr Ado Krige, the Founding Director of House Regeneration, a South African drug rehabilitation centre offering a comprehensive discipleship training program. By applying principles of Biblical Therapy, using the Scriptures to teach, rebuke, correct, and train in righteousness, House Regeneration counsellors show anyone who has suffered from addiction how to fully understand why they do what they do and how to bring their belief systems in line with the Word of God.
